Saturday, April 20

On losing weight

This theme will probably come up every once in a while, as I am going through the process so many have struggled with of losing weight and getting more healthy.  In my case, it started with a diagnosis requiring surgery on my spine.  But the doctor said I had to be a certain weight to have the surgery.  Let's just say about 60 pounds less than where I was.  This was in December.  So I talked to the good folks @sanford here in Fargo, and got on their medical weight loss program.

It's been really hard.  I had a pretty severe addiction to mountain dew.  And I had never really dieted before.  And it has been a long time since I weighed so little.  But I have reached my goal now of losing 60 pounds (I might keep dieting for a bit now, since it's going so well).  It's really weird for me.  People notice I've lost weight.  All my clothes are falling off.  I can move around a lot easier now.  Certainly my other medical conditions have improved.  I still get hungry sometimes and wish I could just eat whatever I want.  I suppose that might not ever go away.  But for the first time in... ever, I'm starting to wonder if I could be normal-sized.  What would that even mean?  Could I live that way?  I have always felt a certain pride in not conforming to society's expectation of women to be thin and perfectly coiffed all the time.  Would being normal-sized mean giving into that pressure?  Or can I do it for me and that's all it is?  Still working on that one.  I would love to hear from others who have struggled with body image issues and have either learned something or are also struggling with it now.

Before

After

2 comments:

  1. I don't think it is conforming to society's expectations of a woman. The lessons you learn from learning to eat like we all should have been doing from the beginning are worth it. Your goals don't have to be about weight. The weight will stabilize itself to what it should have been for you as you begin to live your life as we all should have from the beginning.

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  2. I gained weight to make myself invisible, now health issues are forcing me to lose the weight. It is very difficult when people say I look good. And since these people didn't know me when I was thin before they really go on and on. It's smart to think about the why or you will just gain the weight back. I think that women are judged by what they look like. Walk into any business meeting, most of the women wear makeup and heels. I am more successful at my job since losing 30 lbs.

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