Victim Blaming

I will admit that I am trying to get people interested in my blog by sometimes writing about controversial things.  But I think if we don’t talk about these problems, they will never get better.

So, this topic is in the news lately.  Between the unarmed black men (and children) being shot by police, and the rape victims being slut-shamed, it seems our media is obsessed with explaining away these things without admitting that our system isn’t working and that the powers that be are corrupt.

We can never move forward in reconciling victims and perpetrators until we can talk about the things that happened truthfully.  One of the justice concerns I have regarding the incarceration of so many people is that it doesn’t really help victims or the people responsible for the hurt.  It may help society in the sense that people who commit crimes are not free to keep committing them while they are imprisoned.  But we know that many people become much harder criminals during their time in prison.  When they are released, they are more likely to commit more violent crimes than if they were treated for problems. (see: http://www.prisonfellowship.ca/resources/issues-statistics/)

Quite often, victims and their families want things like to know what really happened, or to make the person understand their hurt.  Of course there are people who just want them executed, but not everyone feels closure over that. 

And when we imprison children, with no access to a “normal” life, they grow up to be exactly the thugs we expect them to be.  It’s one thing to try and rehabilitate a 40 year old person who has assaulted many people over their adult life.  It’s another thing to give up on a kid who’s 14 and never had adults teach him about how to interact in the world.  No chance to get a decent education.  Lost his brothers or sisters to violence.  Police don’t protect people like that.  The justice system doesn’t do a good job of protecting them either. 

To me, the hard part would be figuring out how to protect victims and potential victims while still treating people who have committed crimes as human and redeemable.  As a Christian, or a person who believes in God/gods/cosmic love, etc. it is difficult to justify writing people off when God seems to be making the point over and over again in the Bible that he doesn’t give up on us.  He wants people to be redeemed and become the full person they are created to be.  Some people are so damaged they are dangerous, that’s true.  But a lot of criminals are just a product of the system we abide. 

Why do we accept this system?  This is a bigger topic than I can do in one blog post, but I’m not just talking about the justice system; I’m talking about the inequality between rich and poor that leaves too many people lost in hopelessness where they can’t eat, can’t learn, can’t support themselves with work.  Why aren’t we trying to solve those problems?  Do we really believe that some people deserve that childhood because their parents are messed up? 

What do you think?

Making Peace

I have been struggling to understand what God expects of us regarding “being peacemakers” for a few years now.  I know that Jesus says a lot about peacemaking (Matt 5:42-44, Luke 6:26-28, 35-36, etc.).  In fact, the whole bible is full of commands and encouragements and examples of how to make peace.  But those stories either seem way too hard to do, or not meaningful to me. 

Lately I have been listening to others who find themselves on this path towards living at peace in the world.  Buddhists seem to have a lot of wisdom about this topic.  I have a friend who often shares the wisdom she draws from her religion. 

The struggle I have is not so much to respond in anger when people hurt me or treat me poorly; I struggle more with my attitude and with trying not to cause problems or pain for others.  The person I interact with most is my husband, and there are some examples I can draw on that I think we can all relate to.  For example, sometimes he wants to do watch a movie together or go out some place that we would both enjoy.  He is motivated by his love for me and his interest in the movie or speaker.  However, sometimes I want to do something else.  Not something bad, but something that only benefits me (play a video game, watch a movie he wouldn’t enjoy); and I try to get my way.  At that moment I am not thinking about peace; I am only thinking about doing what I want.

The question I have is: when is it OK to pursue my own desires and when should I be willing to give?  I mean, Jesus and the Bible make it sound like we should always be making peace with people.  So does that mean I can state my preference, but I should give in if it seems like someone would be hurt?  Or does it only mean not returning violence with violence?  But how do you define violence? 

Or is God only talking about systemic violence?  I know that shooting unarmed people, regardless of race, is wrong.  In the old days, I’m pretty sure the police would try to arrest someone instead of shoot them.  Maybe I’m wrong, but that’s what I think.  And the capitalist system we currently have, with so few protections for workers and consumers is certainly hurting and even killing people.  Millions of children and elderly people are hungry, that seems like a form of violence when so many other people have enough food to throw a lot of it away. 

What do you think is expected of us?